Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Accident Prone Kilometre

Driving down the National Highways of India, you get to see these boards now and then. Usually you find it near to a busy junction or sharp bend or blind turning the road. Similarly there are some people who can be called accident prone kilometer themselves. Things just happen to them in the most incredulous way, sometimes again and again. Let’s see what happened to Guptaji.

1. Guptaji and wife go to the railway station to receive some relatives. He wears a new kurta. As they stand on the platform, a train just leaves in the opposite direction and someone throws a pack of half eaten idli sambhar on to the platform or say directly onto Guptaji.

2. Guptaji buys a new car and parks it on the street. A coconut falls on a passing truck, gets deflected smashes the front screen.

3. Guptaji is going to home town by train. He has got himself a top berth so that he may sleep whenever he wishes to. In wee hours of morning, Guptaji tries to get down and discovers that someone had left the turkey towel to dry on the ladder. He jumps and promptly lands on to a fruit knife in open bag below.

4. Guptaji takes a holiday to Kerala. He is happy to see the greenery and fresh air and rolls down the windows of the taxi a take a fresh breath and gets splattered with puke. Someone has put his head out of the window to do so on the bus the taxi is overtaking.

5. Guptaji goes to enquire what the commotion is about in the marketplace. It seems a thief is being given the thrashing. And when the crowd wants to know who the accomplice is, he points to Guptaji and …

6. Guptaji comes home late after a party, changes clothes and goes off to sleep. In the morning, he goes to answer the doorbell and gets a queer look from milkman. He has his wife’s kurta on( all floral prints).

7. Guptaji( I.K Gupta) is a candidate at club election. And all the votes intended for him goes to L.K Gupta because the “L’ was written as ‘l’.

8. Guptaji’s Patient health card is borrowed by brother to avail free medical checkup and he eventually develops complications and dies. The PSU records now consider Gupta dead though he is very much alive. If he told the truth, he will be taken to court and his family will not get even a penny as compensation.

34 comments:

  1. so funny! and some of it will happen to some people some time.

    if it happens all the time, the person should take pics of these incidents, contact or develop a telemarketing product and say these things stopped happening after using it.

    there is a fantastic one on evil eye on teleshopping. child doesn't eat, girl gets good husband and what with speciall effects for the evil eye:D

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  2. Hahahahaha. All funny. I laughed out loud reading about Guptaji getting puked upon on the roads of Kerala. I understand you have considered all details and technicalities while coming up with this humorous list.

    :-) Enjoyed reading it.

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  3. As always, humourous to the core;P

    Poor Guptaji...he seems to be destined to be this accident prone gentleman always at the receiving end!

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  4. Comical , funny but not for the poor fellow.
    Enjoyed the piece

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  5. GUPTA ji se kahiye GUPT rahenn .. pata nahin aur kya kya ho jayega..

    Hilarious Poor Mr. Gupta.. but hey good thinkgs also mgiht happen the
    Votes from L gupta might come ot him..

    or some other sort of thing..

    Loved reading it :)

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  6. Very funny. Poor Guptaji! Refer to No. 6.

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  7. Could not help holding my stomach in pain from the laughs.Great HL

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  8. OMG!! I can empathize with Guptaji! Happens! :|
    8th one is terrible!!
    And 6th is so embarrassing! and as for 4th...eeeekkkks!!
    Very interesting! :)

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  9. now i knw why gupta ji has become so short tempered :P nice post :D

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  10. God Thats sso funny..and scary too :) lolz can someone actually be that accident prone???I really hope not :)

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  11. Wise donkey
    Let's call it 'Anti Evil eye':D

    Insignia
    Yeah major R&D has gone into the post:P

    RGB
    And he get it without asking:)

    Anil Kurup
    I will pass on your sympathies to him

    Bikramjit
    Gupta ji aur Gupt rahein. Asambhav. He will roam around and get into trouble.

    Neena Sharma
    He he

    K Parthasarathi
    Prop some cushions around to cushion the impact:D

    Destiny's child
    Let's start a sympathy fan mail to him:)

    Shilpa
    Are you distantly related to Guptaji? Did any of those happen to you?
    On a serious note, how bad is the natural(flooods) and man made calamity(unrest) in J&K?

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  12. Shesha Chaturvedi
    Has this Guptaji moved to your neighbourhood? Short tempered, is it? Can't blame with so much bad experiences:)

    A New beginning
    Did it scare you, you poor thing.

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  13. Hilarious.It will be hard to contain my laughter next time i see/meet a person with a surname Gupta.

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  14. @ The Holy Lama : Well, you can say that!! LOL!! :D
    I attract embarrassing moments like bees to honey! tripping at the most unusual places and many more which are too embarrassing to be shared!! :P

    Floods are under control and so is the unrest in Srinagar! God bless this land!!

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  15. Maybe you can start a comic strip based on this. :D
    Hilarious. The last one was like an icing on the cake. :)

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  16. Kavita
    Uh oh trouble ahead!

    Shilpa Garg
    Let's hear it, please:P
    And nice to hear that all is well in J& K

    Tomz
    Yeah foot tapping to disaster.

    Renu
    Ab Kya batayen:)

    Swantantra
    THere, the heart melts

    Karthik
    Comic strip is a nice idea...

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  17. Ohh poor Guptaji, but I have a feeling he is an ever smiling man, who goes around with a spring in his step, unmindful of the dangers ahead!

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  18. The biggest supplier of "Laughing Gas" Guptaji Aur Sardarji; a mega venture in the future !

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  19. What an odd but funny collection of incidents :) Would make an interesting comic series.

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  20. Sujata
    Wow. You read people through posts. Absolutely corrrect. Open a branch of Occult sciences:)

    Silverine
    Thank you. The lama feels honoured that you visited and is elated that you tweeted:D

    Antony
    Welcome to lama's lair.
    Yes. Let's bring in the HNIs to invest.:D

    Karthik Shivaramakrishnan
    Welcome karthik and you have been beaten by two others in suggesting the idea of comic strip. You get bronze.:)

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  21. ROFL. And I wish my back would let me actually roll on the floor and laugh. What can I do? Yeah, ok,if I must,I also empathize with Guptaji... ;)But, he does have an eventful life!

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  22. hilarious post..specially the thief pointin thing..is highlight...:))

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  23. Jyothi
    Never a dull moment, Guptaji is living a wonderful life:D And what about your back, tellme, what were you upto?

    Unknown
    Free laughs. Have fun

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  24. Guptaji is a living manifestation of Murphy Law :)

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  25. Hail Guptaji :)
    It was a total fun post!

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  26. Tarun Goel
    Right. You score perfect 10. Welcome to lama's world:)

    Scarlet Pimpernel
    Onanithe oru chiri:)

    $$
    Blessed are we to know Guptaji.:D

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  27. Hey KK , cant comment on the recent post..dont kw whats wrong...the post on trains is just amazing...will try again!!!!

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