Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A hartal day in Kerala

Today is yet another Hartal in God's own country. We have it for many reasons - national, regional and local importance. Today's Hartal is to wake up Union Government to Give green signal to build a new dam over the Periyar river. With Dam 999 movie in theatres, public fear has reached a frenzy, If the 116 yr old Mullaperiyar breaks, the waters will inundate parts of four districts. The waters will move at 100km/hr and reach the biz hub of Cochin in just 4 minutes and wash everything out to sea. A total of 35 lakh people will be killed instantly. So, Keral needs a new dam while TN is happy with the old one which is in kerala but produces power for TN and irrigates its three districts.

So, we have a hartal. No schools, no shops, no buses. People perceive it in different manners.

As my elder son puts it," What a waste . 10 years of studies including 2 years in Kindergarten and you will be killed by floods"

Or take the case of hubby who played good samaritan to a lady waiting for the non coming bus and gives lift. Immediately the guy at the stop too tries to hop in to the rear seat. Hubby," Hey, you. Get in front"

Ride of 3kms. Girl gets off. The car moves and the guy is trying to open door. But the door of the dear car won't budge. He says," Itoo want to get off"

Hubby asks," Where are you going?"
" I just, ah. er..."
" I will drop youat the place"
"Sir, You are taking me to the police , aren't you"
" I'm not that kind of a guy. I'mm good"
Hubby drops him at the next stop.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Reasons to go on a trip

#1. Your cat is bored and so are you

#2. You are tired and can’t sleep

#3. You had enough of the same cribbing from office, in laws, parents and kids

#4. Your camera is sitting idle.

#5. You have a different environ to fight with spouse or even love.

#6. Your maid is taking a holiday

#7. You came into some money

#8. Your neighbor took a holiday.

#9. You suddenly turned pious.

#10. The inflight magazine was responsible.

So, when are you taking a holiday?

Monday, November 21, 2011

Superman comes to Kochi

It was…I think in the month of September. Kerala had just played host to the annual guest – Mahabali and we were still talking Onam. The rains had left Bum Bum with a fever. So after 1 week of self medications, home made concoctions etc, we took him to the doc. She on her part tried to look serious and wrote out a nice little test to be done immediately. It was 8 pm. We took him to one of the 24x7 labs, took his blood and gave for test. The huge massaging chair helped to coax Bum Bum to dispense some blood. We returned to the apartments.

There was little crowd milling around, all looking very serious. Someone came running from the adjoining apartments shrieking, “ No, He is not there”. One woman looked dazed. Men were trying to look strong.

One 5yr old was missing. It seems the mother left him with the tuition teacher and went shopping with little daughter and ayah. Now the apartment is locked and no one answers the bell and he is not to be seen.

Suddenly, someone remembered that he saw the boy riding off in his bicycle. Soon, someone was questioning the guard who said he joined shift at 8.00pm.

The local Hero took his bike and zoomed to 2 police stations and 3 hospitals and was back drawing a blank in 15mins.

Some were trying to push and break the door to enter the apartment. The building secretary was trying to be in all places at once. Bumbum was now discussing with friends about the disappearance.

And then it happened. A man descended into the balcony of the apartment from the apartment above. He got in and found the child deep asleep on bed. The bedroom TV was on.

Clad in red T shirt and Black trousers, this superman had worn his ‘undies’ inside, or we would have known earlier.

He was our plumber.

P.S He was assisted by our electrician who placed a ladder from the flat above to this balcony.

Monday, November 14, 2011

For Your Information

It was almost dusk when my younger son barged home. Angry, he was on the verge of tears. It seems, his big brother had shooed him off the football match they were playing with the rest of the kids in the complex. We had moved in about two weeks ago and the boys had found their friends. I still didn’t know the people beyond the adjoining floors. So, I went along with him to reinstate him and get to know the moms. I found a group sitting on the bench enjoying the breeze, the game and gossip. I joined them.

After a while Mom A stood up and checked the seat of her dress to find that it was wet. The rains earlier the day had seeped into the grooves of the granite bench where she had been sitting. This turned the conversation to the incidents where one felt really uncomfortable.

Mom A, “The time I broke my shoe in Dubai…. We were just going enter this hotel lobby and it breaks”
Mom B., “ Oh! Really”.
Mom A, “ It was so embarrassing and you know that it was The Atlantis. And we had to buy another pair from the adjoining mall and it came to 4000+”
All, “My, My”
Read message: She has been to The Atlantis in Dubai

Now it Mom C’s turn
Mom C, “You know once when we flying in from Singapore, the sandals broke”
Mom B, “How did you manage? Didn’t you sis-in-law make fun of you”
Mom C, “ No. This time I was flying into Cochin not Chennai. I just took it off and walked. It was only Dad who would know me”.
Read message: She has been to Singapore at least twice

Mom B didn’t want to be left behind
Mom B: Nothing will beat my daughter’s condition. She was at this diamond store where she usually goes to and admiring herself in a full length mirror when the damn pencil heel broke. And the guys there were trying their level best to stifle laughter.
Mom A: Did she make a purchase?
MomB: She did. She chose that necklace and rushed to car while I remained to pay the bill.
Tee hee..went all.
But message went across: The marriageable age daughter has got another diamond necklace…any grooms?

By this time one guy walks up to the bench holding a baby
Says he in a feminine voice,”Hi girls(where all of them are on the wrong side of 35)”
Displeasure writ large on their face, the girls return the Hi and get up to disperse.

I had enough of ‘Knowing Thy Neighbours’ session and was relieved with this break by guy-uhhh-girl( not sure about gender)