It was almost dusk when my younger son barged home. Angry, he was on the verge of tears. It seems, his big brother had shooed him off the football match they were playing with the rest of the kids in the complex. We had moved in about two weeks ago and the boys had found their friends. I still didn’t know the people beyond the adjoining floors. So, I went along with him to reinstate him and get to know the moms. I found a group sitting on the bench enjoying the breeze, the game and gossip. I joined them.
After a while Mom A stood up and checked the seat of her dress to find that it was wet. The rains earlier the day had seeped into the grooves of the granite bench where she had been sitting. This turned the conversation to the incidents where one felt really uncomfortable.
Mom A, “The time I broke my shoe in Dubai…. We were just going enter this hotel lobby and it breaks”
Mom B., “ Oh! Really”.
Mom A, “ It was so embarrassing and you know that it was The Atlantis. And we had to buy another pair from the adjoining mall and it came to 4000+”
All, “My, My”
Read message: She has been to The Atlantis in Dubai
Now it Mom C’s turn
Mom C, “You know once when we flying in from Singapore, the sandals broke”
Mom B, “How did you manage? Didn’t you sis-in-law make fun of you”
Mom C, “ No. This time I was flying into Cochin not Chennai. I just took it off and walked. It was only Dad who would know me”.
Read message: She has been to Singapore at least twice
Mom B didn’t want to be left behind
Mom B: Nothing will beat my daughter’s condition. She was at this diamond store where she usually goes to and admiring herself in a full length mirror when the damn pencil heel broke. And the guys there were trying their level best to stifle laughter.
Mom A: Did she make a purchase?
MomB: She did. She chose that necklace and rushed to car while I remained to pay the bill.
Tee hee..went all.
But message went across: The marriageable age daughter has got another diamond necklace…any grooms?
By this time one guy walks up to the bench holding a baby
Says he in a feminine voice,”Hi girls(where all of them are on the wrong side of 35)”
Displeasure writ large on their face, the girls return the Hi and get up to disperse.
I had enough of ‘Knowing Thy Neighbours’ session and was relieved with this break by guy-uhhh-girl( not sure about gender)
Monday, November 14, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Living in an apartment
We moved in to a apartment complex about a year ago. And I am still getting to know the life in one.
Recently, the security agency at the main gate changed. Blue shirts were replaced with green shirts. And for the last three days, we could hear water running in the flat above. So, we finally decided it was time to report. Hubby gave his advice on doing so and went to the gym. I was cooking and expecting guests later in the day. with many things on my mind, I dialled 1002.
A voice on other end said,"Police Control Room"
Wow, the security fancies to call itself the police control, I thought and said" Iam calling building 2 flat 5c and please send the plumber."
"The voice," Lady, this is Police Control Room"
"Yeah, yeah. I Know."
"Do You where you have called?"
" I called the main gate. It is where we call. The plumber never answers his number"
"Please listen. This is Police Control Room"
I glanced down for first time during entire conversation. I was calling on the blue phone and not on the red intercom. I smashed the receiver down.
And now the blue phone is dead.
Recently, the security agency at the main gate changed. Blue shirts were replaced with green shirts. And for the last three days, we could hear water running in the flat above. So, we finally decided it was time to report. Hubby gave his advice on doing so and went to the gym. I was cooking and expecting guests later in the day. with many things on my mind, I dialled 1002.
A voice on other end said,"Police Control Room"
Wow, the security fancies to call itself the police control, I thought and said" Iam calling building 2 flat 5c and please send the plumber."
"The voice," Lady, this is Police Control Room"
"Yeah, yeah. I Know."
"Do You where you have called?"
" I called the main gate. It is where we call. The plumber never answers his number"
"Please listen. This is Police Control Room"
I glanced down for first time during entire conversation. I was calling on the blue phone and not on the red intercom. I smashed the receiver down.
And now the blue phone is dead.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Playing Host
Summers and you don different garbs. You play host, tour, work, and generally are the verge of losing it when school reopens, monsoons come and life returns to normal. In the following weeks I will recollect some of the abnormal experiences. Here is first one.
Husband's co has a stockist in Bangalore who came down to visit Kochi. The Husband and wife duo were made for each other measuring not an inch above five feet, equally clueless about what to expect and equally carried by those lovely houseboat pics that tourism offices put up around the world. And to top it all, they were pure vegetarians -Jains( mostly ultra orthodox sect who won't have any vegetable that grows underground, won't dine at a veg+ non veg restaurant and even not like the vegetarian fare around). Jain tourists usually cook their own food or bring packed food for foreign tours!
We had to take them around Cochin and spend the day with them. Our guests originally belonged to Rajasthan but had been living in Bangalore for last 35 years. They had two grown up children who had recently married. So the couple were out for their second honeymoon.
They arrived late morning. We started with Mattanchery. By the time we reached the Jewish synagogue , it was closed for siesta and was to reopen by 3pm. So I tried to engage their interest in antique jewellery and furniture shops of Jew Town. But they were unamused and the lady kept repeating that they would get cheap stuff in Kolkatta where they shopped for daughter's wedding. I however continued my efforts to generate interest. But their bored looks made us try another attempt which was taking them to Fort Kochi, the place known for the Chinese fishing nets. But the decision was wrong. The beach and wharf stank of fish and the lady was almost blue in face closing noseand mouth. Her eyes pleaded rescue which we promptly did and took them to one of the oldest churches in the area. Another lesson learnt-Jains are not interested in churches even if they have Portugese inscription, centuries old Punkahs and nice wooden pews.Evey now and then, they would ask, "Will we going on a houseboat today?" to which we would be patient and say that good houseboat tours are in neighbouring dist. Alappuzha and that they can go on one the next day or the day after. But no avail. The question was a good example of periodic motion and was put to us at regular intervals.
After lunch from a Gujrati restaurant, we took them again to the synagogue. I tried to explain Jews and Judaism to the uninterested couple who made a face looking at the paintings depicting arrival and progress of Jews in Kerala. I ranted on my knowledge. At last they asked a question "Ganne ka juice jaisa
"( Like cane juice?)
That shut me up for the rest of day. I have answered some weird questions in life but this was too much.
P.S This just a humourous generalisation. I know many saner Jains.
Husband's co has a stockist in Bangalore who came down to visit Kochi. The Husband and wife duo were made for each other measuring not an inch above five feet, equally clueless about what to expect and equally carried by those lovely houseboat pics that tourism offices put up around the world. And to top it all, they were pure vegetarians -Jains( mostly ultra orthodox sect who won't have any vegetable that grows underground, won't dine at a veg+ non veg restaurant and even not like the vegetarian fare around). Jain tourists usually cook their own food or bring packed food for foreign tours!
We had to take them around Cochin and spend the day with them. Our guests originally belonged to Rajasthan but had been living in Bangalore for last 35 years. They had two grown up children who had recently married. So the couple were out for their second honeymoon.
They arrived late morning. We started with Mattanchery. By the time we reached the Jewish synagogue , it was closed for siesta and was to reopen by 3pm. So I tried to engage their interest in antique jewellery and furniture shops of Jew Town. But they were unamused and the lady kept repeating that they would get cheap stuff in Kolkatta where they shopped for daughter's wedding. I however continued my efforts to generate interest. But their bored looks made us try another attempt which was taking them to Fort Kochi, the place known for the Chinese fishing nets. But the decision was wrong. The beach and wharf stank of fish and the lady was almost blue in face closing noseand mouth. Her eyes pleaded rescue which we promptly did and took them to one of the oldest churches in the area. Another lesson learnt-Jains are not interested in churches even if they have Portugese inscription, centuries old Punkahs and nice wooden pews.Evey now and then, they would ask, "Will we going on a houseboat today?" to which we would be patient and say that good houseboat tours are in neighbouring dist. Alappuzha and that they can go on one the next day or the day after. But no avail. The question was a good example of periodic motion and was put to us at regular intervals.
After lunch from a Gujrati restaurant, we took them again to the synagogue. I tried to explain Jews and Judaism to the uninterested couple who made a face looking at the paintings depicting arrival and progress of Jews in Kerala. I ranted on my knowledge. At last they asked a question "Ganne ka juice jaisa
"( Like cane juice?)
That shut me up for the rest of day. I have answered some weird questions in life but this was too much.
P.S This just a humourous generalisation. I know many saner Jains.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
A vacant space
Last week dad's best friend passed away. He was an acute diabetic and living alone after wife's death. The bai(housemaid) would come in at sometime in the day and prepare the next 24 hr meal for him.
That day, he did not answer the bell. The bai called her son who called his sister about 5 kms away. She and another brother broke into the house. The iron grill door took some time to give away. Inside, he lay semi conscious on bed struck with a stroke. They rushed him to the hospital where he lay for a week showing no signs of reversal. He had no children and no will to live.
Dad called up in one evening with the news. I just grunted, talked about few other things before putting down the receiver. I had seen him come to our house almost on adaily basis from the time I could remember anything. As more memories played playback, more tears welled up in the eyes. I rarely called him after I got married. But he was always a part which now lies vacant.
That day, he did not answer the bell. The bai called her son who called his sister about 5 kms away. She and another brother broke into the house. The iron grill door took some time to give away. Inside, he lay semi conscious on bed struck with a stroke. They rushed him to the hospital where he lay for a week showing no signs of reversal. He had no children and no will to live.
Dad called up in one evening with the news. I just grunted, talked about few other things before putting down the receiver. I had seen him come to our house almost on adaily basis from the time I could remember anything. As more memories played playback, more tears welled up in the eyes. I rarely called him after I got married. But he was always a part which now lies vacant.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
A viewpoint
Son goes for NTSE for class III. It being Talent Search, I did not teach him, wanted to know his take.
Son comes back. He has marked options on question paper.Couple of pleasant and unpleasant surprises and then the question
Q. Select the odd one out
a. Deer b. Elephant
c. Tiger d. Rabbit
Answer marked is Elephant. Asked why so. Pat comes the reply,"Because Elephants don't jump, or pounce! "
[......]
"Have you ever seen an elephant jump?", asks he and hops on to the bed to get some sleep.
[...............]
Son comes back. He has marked options on question paper.Couple of pleasant and unpleasant surprises and then the question
Q. Select the odd one out
a. Deer b. Elephant
c. Tiger d. Rabbit
Answer marked is Elephant. Asked why so. Pat comes the reply,"Because Elephants don't jump, or pounce! "
[......]
"Have you ever seen an elephant jump?", asks he and hops on to the bed to get some sleep.
[...............]
Sunday, December 12, 2010
The unmaking of India
This post played on the mind for long. I just didn’t have the courage to spell my fears. For some time now we are hearing and seeing a bit too much that makes us lose the famous Indian complacency. I had been one of the ardent believers of the shining India story. But now I feel the façade is giving away at a mind boggling pace to show the hollow innards of the system. But Iam not trying to bring attention to the majot topics of the day like the telecom scam or Radia tapes, but bring to light a fast spreading phenomenon that can leave the people in the shackles of penury.
GOLD LOAN – a new nomenclature for the old pawn broking business. Many years ago the leaders of newly independent India had taken efforts to push these to mere existence and showed people that banking was a safer and saner solution to financial needs. The habit of saving was inculcated in us and the gold was safest investment and saved to deal with the needs of future.
With increased consumerism, the needs have escalated but the incomes of all haven’t. Senseless borrowing seems to be order of the day. The condition is much like the Hindi sayng”Aamdaani athanni aur karcha rapaiya’ ( income 50 paise and expenditure a rupee). You get loans of all kinds – education, car, vehicle, house, personal needs, business etc. Earlier you went to the bank of financial institution for a loan, now they are after you asking you take a loan. But even with this kind of banking approach, people just want more money faster. Result, they opt for GOLD LOAN. They pawn the ornaments with some new age sahukars and get the money and if the business idea fails end up paying exorbitant interest that squeeze the life out of families.
The GOLD COIN investments are yet another nice way to trap the naïve. A closer inspection to the terms of these brings forth the fact that there is no sale involved. You believe that you invested in gold but have actually pawned the gold. I hope some journalist publishes details of these and people can be saved.
A look at the statistics shows that hundreds of new offices of these not so holy NBFCs have opened. They have made inroads to hitherto unchartered territory snuffing the future out for many. The loans have helped some but harmed many.
GOLD LOAN – a new nomenclature for the old pawn broking business. Many years ago the leaders of newly independent India had taken efforts to push these to mere existence and showed people that banking was a safer and saner solution to financial needs. The habit of saving was inculcated in us and the gold was safest investment and saved to deal with the needs of future.
With increased consumerism, the needs have escalated but the incomes of all haven’t. Senseless borrowing seems to be order of the day. The condition is much like the Hindi sayng”Aamdaani athanni aur karcha rapaiya’ ( income 50 paise and expenditure a rupee). You get loans of all kinds – education, car, vehicle, house, personal needs, business etc. Earlier you went to the bank of financial institution for a loan, now they are after you asking you take a loan. But even with this kind of banking approach, people just want more money faster. Result, they opt for GOLD LOAN. They pawn the ornaments with some new age sahukars and get the money and if the business idea fails end up paying exorbitant interest that squeeze the life out of families.
The GOLD COIN investments are yet another nice way to trap the naïve. A closer inspection to the terms of these brings forth the fact that there is no sale involved. You believe that you invested in gold but have actually pawned the gold. I hope some journalist publishes details of these and people can be saved.
A look at the statistics shows that hundreds of new offices of these not so holy NBFCs have opened. They have made inroads to hitherto unchartered territory snuffing the future out for many. The loans have helped some but harmed many.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Fear Factor
Every year I get annual visits from cousins. One of them comes down with only four things on his mind.
1. Meet all relatives, but stay at a hotel.
2. Visit all major temples and donate lumpsums insisting a hundred times that his name should not be published.
3. Buy more land/ apartment/ house.
4. And instil the fear in you and family that the Hindus are at risk.
The fist exercise leaves everyone with three arches in face - two raised eyebrows and one unhappy mouth.
The second makes sure that all authorities know whose name should not be published
The third has left him lose count of property
And the fourth leaves me with a hoarse voice trying to argue. He is afraid that all non Hindus are having more children...gives some statistic that in Kerala the majority will non hindus in next ten years...that things will be bleak once it happens and so on. And my kids hang around hearing every bit of it. He can't digest I go to a nearby Church for the annual festival there nor that my dad is reading parts of Koran as part of his translation work.
I argue that he is employed by non hindus and lives with family in a non Hindu country with absolutely no problems. Then, he tries to say that people there are different. So, it is not religion that causes problems but just peoples' mindset, I argue.
By then the allotted 30 mins of his valuable time is over. He wraps up the conversation and gives couple of pics of his kids. And hugs my kids and wishes us well and steps out with a Jai Shri Ram! He has three more relatives to visit the same day.
Bye Bye, Cousin till next year.
1. Meet all relatives, but stay at a hotel.
2. Visit all major temples and donate lumpsums insisting a hundred times that his name should not be published.
3. Buy more land/ apartment/ house.
4. And instil the fear in you and family that the Hindus are at risk.
The fist exercise leaves everyone with three arches in face - two raised eyebrows and one unhappy mouth.
The second makes sure that all authorities know whose name should not be published
The third has left him lose count of property
And the fourth leaves me with a hoarse voice trying to argue. He is afraid that all non Hindus are having more children...gives some statistic that in Kerala the majority will non hindus in next ten years...that things will be bleak once it happens and so on. And my kids hang around hearing every bit of it. He can't digest I go to a nearby Church for the annual festival there nor that my dad is reading parts of Koran as part of his translation work.
I argue that he is employed by non hindus and lives with family in a non Hindu country with absolutely no problems. Then, he tries to say that people there are different. So, it is not religion that causes problems but just peoples' mindset, I argue.
By then the allotted 30 mins of his valuable time is over. He wraps up the conversation and gives couple of pics of his kids. And hugs my kids and wishes us well and steps out with a Jai Shri Ram! He has three more relatives to visit the same day.
Bye Bye, Cousin till next year.
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