Thursday, June 24, 2010

It happened to me

I had been putting some things for later for a long while. Travelling to the city centre in morning rush hour was a bit tedious. Finally I thought of doing those. It included the following jobs:
1. A visit to the bank
2. Try to find a book store in south of city for a pocket dictionary for bumbum.
3. Get some ayurvedic medicines
4. Get some fresh pappadams
5. Mend Bumbum’s old umbrella as he broke the brand new one beyond repair.

So, I started earlier than usual at about 9.00am. First stop the umbrella mending guy at wayside.
“He is on long leave”, said his mate, the cobbler.
OKayyy. I gunned my mean machine ( Scooty pep+) to life and vrooom

By 9.40 am I was at the bank’s front gate. The guard smiled wanly. It opened at 10.00a.m. I asked him, “Is there a place nearby to mend umbrellas?”
“Don’t know”

Since there was nothing else to do, I started walking down the road. Let me just tell you exactly how I was: Attire – a kurti and jeans with white jootis with phoolkari type work. A 4 yr bag with faulty zip and awning mouth slung on shoulder. A red kid’s umbrella in hand.

The book store had put the shutters only half up. I got inside and immediately asked the first guy
“Bhargava’s Hindi English pocket dictionary?”
“Eh!”, said he looking at the raised umbrella.
I forgot I was holding it while speaking
I repeated my question
“Sorry, we don’t stock Bhargava.”
Next I asked my favourite question, “Is there a place nearby to mend an umbrella”
That guy looked at the manager for help to answer nerds like me, who volunteered, “You can find one near the theatre up ahead”
So I trudged ahead and found the guy.
“ I mend shoes, no umbrellas. There’s one next junction”

Five minutes to go
“Ok let’s find if we can mend the umbrella”, I told my legs which are not used to walking.
The next junction had a lone lottery seller. Someone was buying a ticket to try luck for the day.
“ Where’s the mending guy?”, I asked
“Oh! He won’t be coming today”
I almost wanted to buy a lottery ticket where the prize was ‘Umbrella mender’. I glanced at the tickets and decided to walk back to the bank.

Bank job done, I went in search of H& C stores for the pocket dictionary. With directions from various people on the road, I got to the complex where it was housed. Next problem, 'where are the stairs up.'
I asked a guy who was sweeping the front of his shop, “Where is this H& C stores”
“Don’t know”, trying to be cold and distant.
So I parked right in front of his store and he gave a questioning look and got a cold distant stare from me.

The next guy showed the way. I trudged up the steps and the moment I started my question” Bhargava’s..”
“ Sorry, stock over”
“ But I called and someone said you had two versions. I come from the suburbs”
“ Sorry. New stock will arrive in two weeks”
“OK can you at least ask your branch in suburb to stock them?”
“Will do”
Thank You

I wanted to give our sweeping friend one more cold stare. But he wasn’t there.

Next stop: Ayurveda shop
It was strarting to drizzle. I got off the sccoty and ran to the shop window with helmet on. Inside, two old timers are having an interesting discussion on carnatic music. They felt disturbed.
I said apologetically, “A bottle of Vyoshamritham and Vasharistham mixed 50-50”.
“Tana, naa,na Haan”, said the animated old timer. The other got up to leave.
“ In ancient Bharata, women were devis. And they had crowns on heads”, the old guy continued pointing to a badge of Sri Ram and Sita on his chest. “ And now”, he continued.
“ They have helmets on”, I offered taking off the helmet.
“Hmmm.” “Do you know when this was?”
I stared clueless.
“About 5000 years ago, when Bharata was a great civilization”
“Oh! No. He’s still on that devi crown saga. He may lecture about wearing sindoor on forehead too. How to scoot fast?” My brains were working overtime.
“Make it a bottle of each. I can mix it at home and use it longer”
And he gave me the medicines.

Now it was my turn to surprise.
“Any umbrella mender around here?”
I gathered my stuff, paid him and went my way. Next time I shop there, I go with a crown on my head.


  1. Disappointing morning I guess !
    Ha and cops wont agree with crown on the head while riding two wheeler.

  2. Ha, ha...liked how you ended the saga. Can actually visualize you with crown on head and riding your scooty vroooooom...around town! Wonder what he would say if he saw me!! He would probably rewind to 10,000 years and tie me up at the nearest post so I don't scoot :P

  3. In ancient India, did women go to buy dictionaries for their kids? Or go to shops to stock up on medicines? Just wondering.
    Hope you got the dictionary. New age India kids need to learn both Hindi and English (and some 2-3 more languages) to survive.

  4. Aha! What a lovely morning! :D
    You left it hanging in the air. Did you finally get bumbum's umbrella fixed at all? :))
    Lovely post! You should write a book titled, "The Chronicles of Bumbum and ..." :) (forgot the other one's name. What is it?)
    It will be success for sure. ;)

  5. God that sure is frustrating..when you start off in the morning thinking that you will be able to complete all the jobs and have to come back disappointed...

  6. he hehehe So you did not get the umbrella mended hmmm.. ah well never minds always a next time .. But now that you reflect bakc i ma sure you can smile :)

    and waise bhi if you finish aal the work what you going to do tomorrow or is it today already ... so good now varoooom on the scooty again .. get the umbrella mended...


  7. Haha...I have come to a conclusion. All things funny start and end at the Lama. This happens to me too. Stuck with deranged old women in the bus, weird guy at the shop, toothless grannies who are seeing me for the first time start off with lectures about Kerala, the CM and the state of things today. Loved this post :D Would love to get a first hand account of how bumbum managed to damage (that rhymes! :D)his umbrella.

  8. hahahaha..kitne saare twists and turns ek morning me..lovely post..really enjoyed reading it..was smiling throughout :)

  9. little kids need pocket dictionary? Am so glad I'm not in school now.
    and yeah a crown sounds like a good idea, next time he gives you lecture on Bharata, please banish him from our civilization. a crown gives you that kinda authority ;)

  10. Hahahahaha. what a lovely morning you have had!! :-P

    I really was smiling throughout and the last line made me grin. You gonna wear a crown! Lol!!!

    Is the umbrella fixed?

  11. Hmm..Different experience in the morning? nice that u shared this..:) on head? what a different thought..wish u all the best.. I'll give this suggestion to some of my frnds..:)

  12. Ha Ha amazing!!!You turned your trip into a great narrative...absolutely loved it KK!!!!!Keep up :)You already have a crown on your head ;)

  13. Really enjoyed reading this :D
    Thanks, and I hope your mornings now are better than that one.
    BTW, what happened to the umbrella?

  14. You made a very frustrating journey into an interesting read! He he...Happens so often na...I sometimes feel the whole world is conspiring against me. Well, I am glad I am not alone. :) I will tell you what is MEN's general attitude. They suggest every other women they see to behave like a Devi and treat their own wives like dirt. I wish we too could sit on a throne wearing a crown.Life would be SOOOO much easier!!!

  15. Anil Kurup
    Hmmm. Cops can pose a problem to Bharata:)

    Don't you go anywhere near. The poor guy will swoon:)

    Come on. Let's wear crown and go shopping for dictionaries

    No such luck, dear fellow. The poor umbrella menders are out of biz bcoz of Chinese umbrellas. They are so cheap that people don't mend anymore, they just buy a new chinese one.

    Lazy Pineapple
    Life is not easy, my dear.:(

    That's a positive to look at things. Oye, thanks puttar

    Destiny's Child
    Do I see one more bus account coming on your blog?

    Kahani mein twist nahin to kya mazaa. But this was a bit too much about Bharata

    Yeah devis with ability to curse and doom:D

    planning to wear crown, yes. Umbrella mended, no.
    See it very complex :P

    Being Promoda
    Yeah start a rage. Girls and women with crowns go shopping, to workplace, to hospital, to college. It will be fun.

    A New Beginning
    Ohyes. But my crown is seen only by the intelligent. How's that for mazka?

    Ayesha Parveen
    Each morning is different. The umbrella isn't fixed yet.

    Yeah life would be easier and we can ask hubbies to buy the latest fahion of crowns, gem studded, pearl studded et al.

  16. so many dissappoinment on as ingle morning:)..BTW in ancient Bharata women didnt do outside work and they were worshipped not burnt for dowry.

  17. Hahaha! That was so very interesting to read but am sure very frustrating to go through it!
    I have had a similar experience of looking for a multi-coloured umbrella which the kid needed for a school performance. Went wherever anybody guided and alas! that 'mera-wala multicoloured kid's umbrella' was not to be seen anywhere!! :P

  18. work not done i know its irritating and more u think that your time was wasted...but that happens sometimes :)

  19. things happens..happens..
    Hope you should have read the horoscope in the news paper after getting home or before starting..
    you would have loled at each incident.
    well in my case..whats written in news paper is just the opposite of what really happens

  20. Hey thanks buddy for the comment :) btw.. this can be soooo frustrating :( but u made it soooo interesting :P

  21. Samvedna
    True.Let's see if he agrees to that too:)

    Shilpa Garg
    Welcome to this space. Glad you liked the narrative. The school demands are sometimes a bit too much.

    Nazish Rahman
    And to top it all, you have be lectured about Bharata

    Sometimes, its out of scope of horoscopes even:)

    Welcome here. Recalling the incidents of the day is funny.