Lama Revealed

It has been a year since I started blogging. Novice writer was the one who led me to it. I started out with a invocation to success. And I have tasted more than that here with blog buddies. I feel happy to blog and meet up interesting people, viewpoints and comments.

Thank You All.

Here are some pics of family characters who appear in the blog.

Self, Bumbum & Boozy, Hubbydear

Spreading the Cheer

There is a State Beverages Corporation outlet right across our office. The outlet has a long queue of most well behaved customers. They are pillars of patience. They wait in burning Sun, pouring rain, closing dusk for their share of bottles for the day. They always have short change and never push in queue. And if there is a holiday or hartal round the corner, they stock up to last the difficult times.

And the just on the footpath by the road is a Chilly Baji, Pakodas, bondas cart which opens at 4pm and does brisk business till the BEVCO outlet is open. Run by a couple, many vouch for the tasty fare they have.

RGB and myself had tasted the chilly bajis and agreed with all and sundry that it was the best we ever had. So, when the monsoons got active, we wanted to have the bajis. We peeped through the window- No cart, No BEVCO. Why, we wonder and like our brethren, we wait for next day. Same scene- No BEVCO, no cart.

RGB is more solid material. I could not take it. My left chest started to ache. To make sure twice over, I went to the balcony leading fire escape and looked for the magic cart. But Alas! No such wonderful sight. Two guys on a bike were also surprised to find BEVCO closed. That made three broken hearts.

As I was walking in from the balcony, I passed the cabin of our office administrator. A man in late forties, he was a dedicated worker. Few spoke to him unless necessary. He seemed to be tense about some job and was sitting looking down, cradling his head in his hands, one of them holding his specs.

I entered the cabin and asked, “Boban Sir?”
“Huh?”, he said looking up bewildered
“The Beverages shop…Why is it not open?”
His lips broke into a smile,”Why? You needed something?”
“Yes”
“Eh?”, he asked amusedly
“ The baji cart is not open. We wanted bajis. No BEVCO. No Cart”
“Oh”, he was laughing relieved and continued. “Don’t know…BEVCO has been closed for two days”

I walked back to my place having spread the cheer.

Teaching session

After a long day at the office, I waddle in home.

“I have a hindi test tomorrow”, says the younger kid all of seven.

“Ok I take a shower and then we will sit together. Learn on your own till then”

After a shower and tea, I ask him to bring the notebook

“Have you learnt?’

“Yes.”

“Ok Let’s see. What’s meaning of mahal?”

A film buff, he adjusted his hair filmy style and replies, “Poverty”

“What?” I burst out laughing. He looks comic with his antics and one tooth in front surrounded by gaps.

“Now, Read it first and then I’ll ask”

He skims it in a minute and returns the book saying, ‘You ask. I’ll answer all of them”

“Ok What’s the meaning of mahal?”
“Palace”, he pipes up

“Garibi?”

“I know that “, says he striking a pose. “Condition”.

“Look bumbum, this is no time for fun. Learn it well”

“Ok”and skims through again.

“This time if you don’t answer, I’m going to beat you,” I say making an angry face.

“Garibi?”
“Poverty”
Right. “Mahal?”
“Palace”
Good. “Halat?”

He thinks a while. He doesn’t know

Then
“I’m going to say now. I’m going to say now. I’m going to say now.”

“Say it then”

“I’m going to say now.”

“I’m listening”, I say loosing my patience

“I’m going to say now (pause) I’m going…”

And he was gone. Out of the room.

Now, whom do I teach?

Management of Change

{This post was originally published in the blog overcuppacopy.blogspot.com. That blog members were in the same workplace, and now are in different places except Expresso aka RGB ofhttp://zingthing.blogspot.com/ and myself aka KK in the same place. We form the creative team to a web and sofware solutions firm in Kochi. Cappuccino is Destiny's child of http://destinyschildsspace.blogspot.com/ and Latte aka Novice writer ofhttp://a-dream-diary.blogspot.com/ }

"Change is inevitable. Your strength and ability lies in adapting and assimilating as much as you can and delivering according to the changed needs", went on the management guru.

The company had arranged a management class for us. And this exceptional talk was in the post lunch session. Dozing off was not possible because it was a small room and there were only about ten of us from the creative division.

“ We are in the service industry and we can survive only if we meet the customer’s demands. Customer satisfaction is a must”, he droned on.

I was just thinking the type of writing that is expected of us sometimes and how we dread to stoop to that standards. But the next day at office, everyone was game to giving it a try- to change.

So we decided to make a change in our spoken English first and then carry it forward to our written English.

Espresso: let’s in the do.

Latte: yes yes

Cappucino: Change is in the us

Myself :My head is in the circle

Espresso: What?

Myself: My head is in the circle

Cappucino leans over to read something on my desktop and: She is in circle and Iam in the runs

Latte(giggling): Sheesh. You in the go there.

Espresso: Me going meeting moron

Myself: me the thirsty

Suze floats in. “Is that interface ready?”, she asks

We blink. We don’t understand.

She asks again.

She hasn’t changed. The management class has not affected her.

“Tell me when it is ready” and drifts off again

Cappuccino looks at the time, “ Oh no. I see butt of bus”

Myself offers, “ Iam the droppings”
And then corrects, “ Iam in the dropping”

What do you suggest? Is change good?

It happened to me

I had been putting some things for later for a long while. Travelling to the city centre in morning rush hour was a bit tedious. Finally I thought of doing those. It included the following jobs:
1. A visit to the bank
2. Try to find a book store in south of city for a pocket dictionary for bumbum.
3. Get some ayurvedic medicines
4. Get some fresh pappadams
5. Mend Bumbum’s old umbrella as he broke the brand new one beyond repair.

So, I started earlier than usual at about 9.00am. First stop the umbrella mending guy at wayside.
“He is on long leave”, said his mate, the cobbler.
OKayyy. I gunned my mean machine ( Scooty pep+) to life and vrooom

By 9.40 am I was at the bank’s front gate. The guard smiled wanly. It opened at 10.00a.m. I asked him, “Is there a place nearby to mend umbrellas?”
“Don’t know”

Since there was nothing else to do, I started walking down the road. Let me just tell you exactly how I was: Attire – a kurti and jeans with white jootis with phoolkari type work. A 4 yr bag with faulty zip and awning mouth slung on shoulder. A red kid’s umbrella in hand.

The book store had put the shutters only half up. I got inside and immediately asked the first guy
“Bhargava’s Hindi English pocket dictionary?”
“Eh!”, said he looking at the raised umbrella.
I forgot I was holding it while speaking
I repeated my question
“Sorry, we don’t stock Bhargava.”
Next I asked my favourite question, “Is there a place nearby to mend an umbrella”
That guy looked at the manager for help to answer nerds like me, who volunteered, “You can find one near the theatre up ahead”
So I trudged ahead and found the guy.
“ I mend shoes, no umbrellas. There’s one next junction”

9.55am
Five minutes to go
“Ok let’s find if we can mend the umbrella”, I told my legs which are not used to walking.
The next junction had a lone lottery seller. Someone was buying a ticket to try luck for the day.
“ Where’s the mending guy?”, I asked
“Oh! He won’t be coming today”
I almost wanted to buy a lottery ticket where the prize was ‘Umbrella mender’. I glanced at the tickets and decided to walk back to the bank.

Bank job done, I went in search of H& C stores for the pocket dictionary. With directions from various people on the road, I got to the complex where it was housed. Next problem, 'where are the stairs up.'
I asked a guy who was sweeping the front of his shop, “Where is this H& C stores”
“Don’t know”, trying to be cold and distant.
So I parked right in front of his store and he gave a questioning look and got a cold distant stare from me.

The next guy showed the way. I trudged up the steps and the moment I started my question” Bhargava’s..”
“ Sorry, stock over”
“ But I called and someone said you had two versions. I come from the suburbs”
“ Sorry. New stock will arrive in two weeks”
“OK can you at least ask your branch in suburb to stock them?”
“Will do”
Thank You

I wanted to give our sweeping friend one more cold stare. But he wasn’t there.

Next stop: Ayurveda shop
It was strarting to drizzle. I got off the sccoty and ran to the shop window with helmet on. Inside, two old timers are having an interesting discussion on carnatic music. They felt disturbed.

I said apologetically, “A bottle of Vyoshamritham and Vasharistham mixed 50-50”.
“Tana, naa,na Haan”, said the animated old timer. The other got up to leave.
“ In ancient Bharata, women were devis. And they had crowns on heads”, the old guy continued pointing to a badge of Sri Ram and Sita on his chest. “ And now”, he continued.
“ They have helmets on”, I offered taking off the helmet.
“Hmmm.” “Do you know when this was?”
I stared clueless.
“About 5000 years ago, when Bharata was a great civilization”
“Oh! No. He’s still on that devi crown saga. He may lecture about wearing sindoor on forehead too. How to scoot fast?” My brains were working overtime.
“Make it a bottle of each. I can mix it at home and use it longer”
“OK”
And he gave me the medicines.

Now it was my turn to surprise.
“Any umbrella mender around here?”
“Eh?”
I gathered my stuff, paid him and went my way. Next time I shop there, I go with a crown on my head.

First tag reply

I never understood tags. I have been tagged quite a few times but I did not respond. Since Bik of http://mann-bikram.blogspot.com/ seems to be a bit too , I reply partly to his tag.

1. What one material thing are you hoping/ scoping to inherit? Ancestral home
2. If You were a character in a movie that you've seen who would I be and why? Saif Ali Khan in Dil Chahta Hai( you seem to be in and out of relationships;))
3. If You could do one thing for Someone, no matter what it was, what would it be for Who? I could have mobilised money for my neighbourhood kid for better treatment( long ago)
4. You’re driving. It’s great weather. Attractive member of opposite sex in expensive car looks at you and half-smiles. You’re in a relationship. Do you return the look and half-smile back? I smile back. Hasne ka tax nahi lagta
5.Pick a situation a. You’re 42. Would you rather go without sex for three years and win a lottery after that, enabling you to never have to work again? Orb. Get twice the lottery money now (at 42) but have your partner sleep with your boss?
a since i can't make a decision about whom my partner sleeps with
6. What has been the craziest thing u have ever done?
Cycle 8 kms at dawn to replace a gadget before anyone knew that it went kaput
7. God gave u chance to alter any one event in the past, present or future. What wud that event be?
Past- no Bopal gas tragedy. Present - No oil spill. Future - The boss stops the banter on recession for not giving a raise
8. Would you rather go bald or lose your front tooth?
front tooth. Can have a dental implant. Bald women aren't interesting especially if they have misshapen heads
9. Your sibling is sleeping with your married close friend. Who do you go to first, sibling or married close friend?
Neither. It'll be too much
10. Would you rather your kid turn out to be a nymphomaniac or gay?(For my amusement, please answer in the format: I would rather my kid be —) Spare me!!!!!!!

Any who love this tagging game can take it up.

A foreigner’s view of Indian weddings

This is a first hand account of what they feel attending Indian weddings:

1. "My, my, do you always have so many guests to the wedding!"
2. "Why do you have so many lamps? What do they signify?"
3. "And why are going round in circles onstage?"
4. "And does the bride wear all that gold later too?"
5. "Why does the couple look so glum? They are not smiling much."
6. "What? Can’t listen with music…"( nadaswaram in background)
7. "Don’t you guys dance. Your films show so much dance and song."
8. "No thank You. I can eat with my fingers"( on being offered a spoon)
9. Seeing everyone leaving after feast, "Is that all?!"
10. Snapping away the pics of dining hall after feast,"I must show everything folks back home"

I request each of you to write something about each:D